Pit: It's Mario!
Palutena: Yep. Mario is a pretty balanced fighter, so you don't need to worry about much.
Viridi: Just watch out for his cape!
Pit: Cape? Is he a superhero now?
Viridi: It's a powerup, silly!
Pit: Ohhhh! I get it now!
Palutena: Back to the task at hand. Pit, hit Mario after he fires a mega fireball. That's when he's weak!
Pit: Got it!
Pit: Look, it's Luigi!
Viridi: Luigi's a scaredy-cat! his brother is way better.
Palutena: Actually, Luigi is more powerful than Mario in some ways.
Pit: Take that, Viridi!
Palutena: Anyways, Luigi's fireballs don't go as far as Mario's, but they can bounce off walls and are more powerful. Keep that in mind!
Palutena: Here we have Peach.
Pit: I know who she is! You don't need to remind me.
Palutena: *laughs* just thought you needed a mind refresher.
Pit: Mind refresh? Ahhh!!!
Viridi: It's a phrase! Don't you know anything?
Pit: *gets angry* Yeah! I know a lot!
Palutena: Settle down guys! One of Peach's attacks is shoving a Toad in your face, so if you see her start to reach for one, step back!
Pit: Toads are slimy!
Palutena: *laughs* not that kind of Toad!
Pit: What's her name again?
Palutena: Rosalina. She's the owner of the Comet Observatory and mother of the Lumas.
Viridi: Yeah. She also has a cool wand.
Pit: That's completely off topic!
Viridi: What I was GOING to say was that it can send some crazy spells. Watch out for them!
Palutena: Yes, Pit. Look out for her spells. Also try to hit her after sends one because that's when she's weak.
Pit: Got it, Lady Palutena!
Viridi: It's Bowser!
Pit: He's huge!
Palutena: Yes, but the bigger the slower. You can use his weight to his advantage by flying over him and getting him from behind.
Viridi: His weight also means he can't jump as high, so get to a high place if you need to escape!
Pit: Why does Mario always invite Bowser to his events? I mean, they're enemies!
Palutena: I don't know, but I know that everyone should get invited to Go-Karting!
Pit: Vvrrroom! Vrrrrrrrrr BANG! Boom! Vrroom!
Viridi: Who really is Bowser Jr?
Pit: Bowser's son, of course!
Viridi: I thought the Koopalings were Bowser's sons!
Palutena: Bowser Jr is Bowser's only real son. No one really knows where the Koopalings came from.
Pit: I wonder if they're adopted...
Palutena: That's actually a very popular theory, Pit! Anyways, Bowser Jr's drill is extremely effective, so try to dodge it if you can. All his attacks look similar though, so try to fly up before he attacks.
Pit: An apple a day keeps the doctor away!
Palutena: *laughs* looks like you haven't been eating your apples lately then!
Pit: I don't need to! I can take this guy down! He's just like Mario!
Palutena: Actually, Dr. Mario is a bit more powerful than normal Mario, But he's also a bit slower. He can through pills, so look out for those!
Viridi: I don't know if I can trust this guy with medical care...
Viridi: Who's this little guy?
Palutena: That's Captain Toad. He is the leader of the Toad Brigade and loves to find treasure!
Pit: He looks so harmless!
Palutena: Yes, but look out. He can throw turnips at you, and his final smash is Wingo the bird will scratch you then use his beak to throw you off the screen!
Viridi: Wow, he seems pretty menacing now!
Pit: Bring it on!
Pit: DK! Donkey Kong! He's finally he-
Palutena: Pit, focus. This fighter can really pack a punch.