Previously on Fandemonium:
Alice: Brilliant!
Jake: Which of us three gets to claim victory, though?
Alice: I guess Volt can have it. He did the hard part…
Announcer: Well, there you have it, folks! VOLT IS THE WINNER!
Jake: Well, here it is… it’s already starting to smell. Better do this quickly…
(Jake picks up Marley’s corpse in his arms and takes it back to his room)
(Contestants are gathered in the dining hall)
Announcer: Alright! The results are in. One of you will be eliminated, and forever lose your chances of winning this mansion.
Frolo: Are you gonna do a dramatic countdown?
Volt: Yeah! Dramatic countdowns are awesome!
Mika Sho: Hmph. I’m sure they’re awesome for you, since you don’t have to be worried about elimination…
Announcer: Calm down, I’m not going to bother counting the votes. We only got a few. And it’s Sk8. He’s out. Sorry.
Sk8: WHAA?! NO! This mansion is TOTALLY RADICAL… I NEED it.
Announcer: The exit is that way. I’ve already paid for your flight home.
(Sk8 exits the mansion sulkily)
Announcer: Okay, now for the fun part. We have exactly 20 contestants left. That means I can divide you evenly into four teams.
Announcer: Now, listen. I am not your enemy. I want you all to succeed. Therefore, I will be allowing you to choose your teams.
Koloro: Ooh! I love teamwork!
Cookie: Yaaay! I call being with Trixie!
Purple: I guess I’ll join your team too...
(Some time later…)
Announcer: Alright. Here are the teams:
Announcer: RED TEAM: Fyre, Mika Sho, White, Danni, and Leah.
Danni: Lovely. When exactly did we agree to let the psycho onto our team?
Announcer: You were the only team that had four contestants. Sorry. Anyways:
Announcer: BLUE TEAM: Volt, Alice, Jake, Koloro, and Speedy.
Speedy: Bwap?
Announcer: YELLOW TEAM: Trixie, Cookie, Purple, Zane, and Frolo.
Announcer: GREEN TEAM: Light, Scotch, Jane, Rosa, and Alyssa.
Announcer: Now, go ahead and have breakfast. You’ll be sitting with your teams, from now on.
----
(RED TEAM EATS BREAKFAST)
Fyre:...
Mika Sho:...
White:...
Danni...
Leah: I WILL FEAST ON YOUR HEARTS.
(BLUE TEAM EATS BREAKFAST)
Volt: This food is delicious!
Alice: Yeah, it is! …Say, do you smell something?
Koloro: Yep. Smells like… *sniff* …DEATH.
Speedy: Bwaaaap??
Jake: No comment.
(YELLOW TEAM EATS BREAKFAST)
Trixie: Holy wow, cookie! This food is amazing.
Cookie: We should try to cook it together sometime!
Purple:.....
Zane:...
Frolo: I like to cook too!
(GREEN TEAM EATS BREAKFAST)
Alyssa: I wonder how they have so much food on this island in the middle of the ocean…
Scotch: Hell if I know, but the beer is good.
Light: Do you drink anything but beer?
Scotch: Nnnnope.
Rosa: Huehuehuehue!
(Contestants are gathered outside the mansion)
Announcer: Alright. I hope you all enjoyed breakfast. Or at least ate something, because our next contest will require your full concentration.
Alyssa: What is it?
Announcer: It's a test.
Alyssa: What kind of test?
Announcer: A math test.
Jane: That's... @#*$ING RIDICULOUS! NOBODY TOLD US WE'D HAVE TO DO MATH TESTS!!
Zane: Um... I don't have any formal education. Birds don't go to school...
Announcer: Too bad. Here are your tests. No cheating.
(RED TEAM TAKES THE TEST)
White: Ack, I'm nervous...
Danni: Right. Because a piece of paper is so intimidating.
Mika Sho: Danni, no need to be rude. White, just do your best. If we fail, at least we can say we tried!
Leah: WE... ARENTGONNAFAIL HAHAHAHA.
Fyre: ...?
(BLUE TEAM TAKES THE TEST)
Jake: Pfft, this is easy. I do this kind of thing every day.
Volt: Psst, Koloro... what's a sin?
Koloro: It's when you do something bad.
Volt: Oh, okay! So it's a trick question. Thanks!
Alice: Um... I'm just gonna copy Jake's answers.
Speedy: BWAP???
(YELLOW TEAM TAKES THE TEST)
Cookie: Hey, BFF, what's a sin?
Trixie: It's pronounced "sine." It's the opposite divided by the hypotenuse.
Cookie: Oh, okay!
Frolo: How do you know this stuff...?
Trixie: I learned it in baking school - you know, in order to slice perfectly triangular pieces of cake.
Zane: I'm so lost.
(GREEN TEAM TAKES THE TEST)
Light: PFFT. MATH. This is so lame.
Scotch: What's a... math??
Rosa: Huehue! You is not knowing?
Jane: You IDIOT!! You dont even KNOW what MATH IS?
Alyssa: Hang on. Let me handle this.
(RED TEAM TAKES THE TEST)
Leah: I... will KILL the other teams.
Danni: Violence solves everything for you, doesn't it.
Mika Sho: Wait! No!
(Mika grabs onto Leah's back, ripping the lethal injection from her grasp)
(BLUE TEAM TAKES THE TEST)
Jake: I'm done!
Alice: Psst... I don't think the penguin knows how to do math.
Koloro: Look, his test is blank. He can't even hold a pencil...
Jake: *sigh* I guess I'll have to do two tests, then...
(YELLOW TEAM TAKES THE TEST)
Cookie and Trixie: We're done!
Purple: Um... me too.
Frolo: Dude, what the heck are we even doing?
Zane: I have no idea...
(GREEN TEAM TAKES THE TEST)
Alyssa: Listen, see this line? Pretend that's a gun.
Alyssa: And that dot? That's an enemy soldier. Now, what's the angle of the line?
Scotch: Approximately 46.2835 degrees, ma'am.
Alyssa: See? That's all that math is.
Scotch: Hmph. If it's so easy, Maybe I shoulda gone to that math school my da always talked about...
(LATER...)
Announcer: Alright, time's up.
Alyssa: What are the results?
Announcer: ...Nobody on the red team finished their test.
Announcer: Volt and Koloro failed... yet Jake, Alice, and somehow Speedy all passed.
Announcer: Trixie, Cookie, and Purple passed, but Zane and Frolo Failed.
Announcer: And... Everyone on the Green Team passed!
Announcer: Since Red Team lost, vote off one of their members in the comments.
Voting options:
Fyre
Mika Sho
White
Danni
Leah