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Aye b0ss. This is a joke article.
Five Nights at Forpadorps is a game set to be released for the PC in about 2 days, thanks to Scott shitting out games like there is no tomorrow. This game will feature a brand new cast of Animatronics to scare the shit out of Lets Players.
A new feature in this game is saying certain things into the mic will make animatronics go away. If you don't have a mic, you can have death instead :)
An alien that looks somewhat like an adult toy. Can be avoided by shutting the door.
Swiper The Fox
A fox ripped straight from Dora The Explorer. Can be avoided by screaming "SWIPER NO SWIPING" into the mic. He will then say "AW MAN" and retreat back to his lair.
The one and only John Cena has made a suprise appearence in this game. He can be avoided by singing the tune of "My time is now" (DO DO DO DOOOOO).
Rolf From Ed Edd and Eddy
Rolf will appear through a wormhole in the center of your room. He will cover up all cameras and will start to say "Life has many doors ed boy!" over and over again until you die. The only way to avoid is to scream "THATS MY HORSE" into the mic.
Deez Nuts Guy
The man straight out of the unfunny vine that has captured millions of 5 year olds attention. He will scream DEEZ NUTS when he appears and can only be sent away by screaming "GOT EEM" into the mic.