| Season 1, episode 7|
| Written &|
Bermuda Bermuda is the seventh episode in the first season of Fantendo Now. It is the seventh episode overall.
Leah, Sakeena, X-Ray and PalmMan head to the Bermuda Triangle in search of a rare flower, discovering an entire civilization populated by Amelia Earhart's children who don't age thanks to a Fountain of Youth.
Written by Exotoro
Unten sits down in Sakeena's living room meditating. Suddenly the door opens and Leah takes a biiiiig step in. Unten gets out of his relaxing pose to look at Leah.
- Unten: How did you even get inside?
- Leah: The door wasn't locked.
- Unten: Huh.
X-Ray walks in and waves to Unten.
- Unten: Well, what are you and X-Ray doing here?
- Leah: I need sidekicks for my journey to the Bermuda Triangle.
- Unten: Isn't X-Ray one?
- Leah: Plural. And X-Ray is not a sidekick. Are you up for it?
- Unten: Are you crazy? I'm not going to the Bermuda Triangle with you.
- Leah: Your loss, I guess! Hey, anyone else at home?
Sakeena slides down the stairwell.
- Sakeena: I'm home! What are we doing?
- Unten: They're going to the Bermuda Triangle for something.
- Sakeena: Oooo!
- Leah: You up for it, Metals?
- Sakeena: Am I?
- Leah: You're supposed to tell me.
- Sakeena: Yeah!
- Palmman: Jeez, what's up with all the shouting? Can barely talk to Dragonman.
- Sakeena: Leah's going to the Bermuda Triangle and I'm going with her! Just like in my fanfic...
- Palmman: I've always wanted to see the Bermuda Triangle. Heh. Count me in.
- Leah: See you later, Unt... hmm... trying to think of a condensing nickname for you... I can't.
- Palmman: Try Unteeny?
- Leah: See you later UNTEENY!
Leah and the others leave and slam the door loudly.
- Unten: Phhhh... what a bunch of lame-os.
Unten goes to meditate again.
Leah puts on goggles and plays with the propeller of the plane. Sakeena and the others get in the back of the plane. Sakeena has a clipboard which she's writing stuff in as PalmMan watches with visible disdain.
- Leah: Alright, plane's good, let's go.
Leah sets the plane to autopilot and sits back. The plane takes off into the air by itself as Leah heads off to sleep.
- Palmman: Should the pilot really be asleep?
- Sakeena: The plane's on autopilot.
- Palmman: Yeah but what if it makes a wrong turn or something?
- X-Ray: I wouldn't say this should be a huge worry...
- Palmman: I just wanna get to the Bermuda safe and sound, that's not too much to ask for, right?
Everyone laughs, including Leah who's still asleep. Palmman is visibly confused.
- GPS System: 6 miles to the Bermuda Triangle- fzzzort
Leah suddenly wakes up, spooking Palmman.
- Leah: That's the sound I've been waiting for.
- Palmman: It is?
- Leah: Yeah, that means...
The plane engines short out. Everyone starts screaming as Leah puts her hands up like she's on a rollercoaster ride.
- Palmman: Why did I agree to this?
The plane lands on the shore of a beach. Leah rolls out of the plane unscathed, along with everyone else. Leah lights up a torch she found.
- Leah: Tell me if you see any smoke monsters or polar bears. I don't want 5 seasons of this shit.
- Palmman: 6.
- Leah: Wow, really?
- X-Ray: I see a temple in the back. Way back.
- Sakeena: KILL IT!
Sakeena picks up a rock and tosses it towards the temple.
- Leah: You gotta pick out the bricks of a temple to kill it. Come on, we gotta get closer.
- X-Ray: I feel like something was in the water before we left.
- Palmman: Right?
Leah closes in on the temple and attempts to remove one of the bricks.
- Leah: This is pretty tricky... you just gotta....
Leah slaps the brick as she pulls it with her right hand. Nothing happens.
- Palmman: As much as I'd like to try and kill a temple, what are we really here for?
- Leah: We're here to find a flower with magical properties.
- Palmman: Man... so far Bermuda's been pretty lame...
Arrow flies just by Palmman's head.
- Leah: Run, the natives are here!
The group runs. Out from the bushes steps a woman in a hoodie and a shotgun. She loads a arrow in it.
- Shotgun Woman: Nobody messes with the people of Airheart!
The woman examines the temple and kicks back in the brick Leah was trying to pull out. She pulls out a telephone.
- Shotgun Woman: Yeah, we've got a situation on F-B? Yeah, it's that purple haired woman again. No, I don't know what her deal is.
Leah huffs and puffs as she heads towards the shore. Something rushes past her at a very fast speed and she looks into the water to see herself mouthing something. She can't read lips, so whatever this other Leah is saying isn't helpful.
- Leah: Ah jeez, it's all misty now. I told you guys to tell me if there was a smoke monster.
- Sakeena: Hey... where's X-Ray?
- Leah: Oh god, you better not be kidding me with that.
- Sakeena: No... seriously... where is she?
- Leah: Goddamn it. Hey... you don't think that's...
Leah digs up a light blue dagger. She taps it.
- Leah: Haha, yes!
- Sakeena: What?
- Leah: This is Sentelenium. The dagger blade's made out of the damn thing. It's got kind of a forcefield effect to it.
- Sakeena: Ooo.
Palmman finally catches up with the two.
- Leah: About time. I'm thinking the natives captured X-Ray and are going to sacrifice her to their old and false gods.
- Sakeena: What makes their gods false?
- Leah: Because all of them are false.
Cut to the Fan and the Enemy.
- The Fan: Leah can be kind of an asshole, huh?
- The Enemy: Why are we watching this again?
Leah, Sakeena, and Palmman creep up the the temple. The girl with the shotgun and hoodie has X-Ray on a stone tablet.
- Leah: I TOLD you.
- Palmman: Ugh, fine.
Palmman hands Leah 20 bucks.
- Shotgun Woman: Leah, I can hear you. Get out of there and face me.
- Sakeena: She knows you?
- Leah: Well... not to brag but I'm pretty popular...
- Shotgun Woman: We met like a month ago. She was attempting to take a bunch of relics from the Crash Temple.
- Palmman: Who is she?
- Leah: Hell if I know.
- Shotgun Woman: Okay, now you're just hurting my feelings. The name is Alexandria Earhart.
- Leah: Oh... right! Haha, long time no see...
Shotgun Woman shoots Leah in the shoulder with an arrow.
- Sakeena: Leah!
- Leah: Oh... yeah, I guess I have an arrow in my shoulder now?
- Alexandria Earhart: The venom should set in 5 minutes.
- Leah: Why would you tell me that? Palmman, dig it out of my shoulder. Hey, Metals, you good with knives?
- Sakeena: Uh...
- Leah: Catch!
Leah tosses Sakeena the knife and reflexively Sakeena turns the knife's blade into a bunch of Sentelenium orbs.
- Alexandria Earhart: Ah!
One lodges into her eye. Leah grabs X-Ray and spots the rare flower just a couple of feet away.
- Leah: Alright, I'll grab the flower and you guys get to the plane.
- Palmman: Didn't it crash?
- Leah: So?
Leah goes to grab the flower but is grabbed by a bunch of shadowy people in the bushes. She yelps as the flower drops out of reach as she's dragged away. Palmman, X-Ray, and Sakeena are all grabbed as well.
Leah wakes up with a bag on her head and strapped in a chair. Someone takes it off.
- Unknown man: Sorry, that just flew on there.
Leah sees a woman on the throne in pilot's clothes.
- Leah: Oh hey.
- Woman on throne: Address me by my proper title, Leah.
- Leah: I don't know your proper title. Where's X-Ray?
- Woman on throne: Jeez, no wonder they've been calling you a nightmare. Queen Amelia Earhart.
- Leah: Alright then, Queen Amelia Earfart. What's up.
- Amelia Earhart: You've been here twice.
- Leah: Sorry, didn't know it was illegal to steal here!
- Amelia Earhart: For that, you do realize now that you must suffer the punishment you deserve?
- Leah: Man... I thought you were cool but now I just see you're a pretender.
Leah leans back on her chair and starts taking out the other Earharts in the room. She slams her chair on Earheart's throne... again and again until it finally breaks.
- Leah: X-Ray! Where are you?
Leah spots Sakeena and Palmman in chairs on the far edges of the room. She rolls her eyes as she goes to unfree them.
- Sakeena: I saw where they took X-Ray.
- Leah: Alright, lead the way Metals!
- Sakeena: Gotta take a left here and then a right...
The three find themselves in a room with a spring flowing down it. Alexandria and X-Ray are holding hands as they watch the spring flow down.
- X-Ray: This is an amazing spring, where did you find it?
- Alexandria: It's the spring of eternal youth. It streams down to the fountain below... let me... uh. Huh.
- Leah: I'm gonna kill you!
- Alexandria: Not if I do it first!
- Leah: No, I'm doing it first.
Leah pushes Alexandria into the spring and grabs X-Ray.
- Leah: What a creep huh?
- X-Ray: She seemed nice...
- Leah: Yeah, that's how most people appear to you. Come on, let's get out of here. I think they have like a submarine or something.
Leah finds a World War II era submarine in the docks of the temple.
- Leah: I'll be right back! You guys start the engine!
- PalmMan: Ah jeez, there's so many buttons!
- Sakeena: Maybe it's this switch...
The submarine releases a missile that takes down the dock. The water ripples violently.
- Sakeena: Dang.
- X-Ray: Oo, what about that switch?
The submarine releases a bunch of rubber duckies.
- Palmman: Maybe you gotta turn the key.
Jazz music starts playing. Leah jumps into the submarine.
- Leah: I knew I couldn't count on you guys to operate machinery you've never seen before. Here's how you turn the damn thing on.
Leah flips a lever and the submarine moves. The temple begins to collapse as Leah puts down a jug of water and a flower down on one of the seats. She switches the channel to play "Baker Street" by Gerry Rafferty.
- Leah: BWANANA DANAAA DAAAAA!
Leah returns to the hospital and places the flower in a jug with a bunch of other flowers. She pours the water into the jug.
- Leah: That eternal youth water should keep these flowers looking good. Gotta wait until Valentines Day, heh.
She slaps a post note that says "For X-Ray" and leaves the room.
Alexandria emerges from the fountain as a small child.
- Alexandria: This isn't over, Leah! I'll find a way to age myself up again and when I do, you're going to regret everything you've done to the Earharts!
- Leah Needlenam
- Sakeena Kamel
- The Fan (cutaway gag)
- The Enemy (cutaway gag)
- Alexandria Earhart (debut)
- Amelia Earhart (debut)
- Former Four (cameo)
|The Great Train Robbery • Witch House • Metamorphosis • Singing and Dancing • Halal and Hotdogs • Another One • Bermuda Bermuda • The Apprentice • Crash • Xerox • 3.14 Neon • PalmMan in Miami • Bad Vibes • City of Flames • Prom Night|
|Settling into Boltzmann|